Summer in lb

The sun has come out, the temperature has gone up, and the girls have gone practically naked… all are indicators that summer in Lebanon is finally here.

Lebanon’s weather is as diverse as diverse can be.  In winter, people can still go out in t-shirts, spend some time on the beach getting a tan, and enjoy the outdoors in every summer way possible while still enjoying a cozy meal by the fire and the white slopes of its mountains.  None the less, summer is still different.

Most of the Lebanese expats come back to spend the summer, some to see their families, some of which are here for a quick summer fling, and others are here looking to arrange a marriage (Puppy in the Window Syndrome…but that is another story).

The whole country is up to its nose with people; car rental agencies become all rented out, hotels are up to 103% in capacity, streets that are made to fit 2 million are crowded with about 8 million, reservations to anywhere have to be done months in advanced, and everyone acts as if they are on vacation when the truth of the matter is the alarm clock rings at 6:00 a.m. for them to get up to work.

Women all over the country start dressing as if the only garments available in shops are the short shorts.  Jeans ones, black outs, white ones, printed ones, tight ones, lose ones, any ones will be good enough to make the boys’, and in some cases, the girls’ heads turn; that’s the idea.  Skin, flesh, skin, flesh, and little is left to the imagination, but hey… it’s hot.

But, by far, the phenomenon that truly makes it summer in Lebanon in that everyone seems to be in heat.  Night clubs and beach resorts appear to be a scene from a Discovery Channel documentary about “Wild Sex”. 

You could only imagine…

For me, the thing I just love about summer is feeling the heat of the sun on my skin and how a soft breeze cools me down while I sun bathe and how I see my surroundings slightly darken from the shadow of the palm tree above that shades me as the wind blows.

What is your favorite thing about summer?

Women Drivers

This post isn’t intended to undermine any female driver or emphasis that men are better drivers; it’s just to point out some things I’ve realized in my modest 6 years of driving.

Women are the worst, most ill-mannered, most impatient, and dumbest creatures to get behind the steering wheel.  And the only type of driver that could measure up to a woman driver is a 60 something year old Lebanese Taxi driver.

(My female readers are muttering in discontent, especially that this is coming from a woman driver.)

Below is a list of things that I have realized that some woman drivers do as part of their driving regime.

1.       Considering that most think of themselves as multi-task individuals (peh!!), they drink coffee from an uncovered mug, smoke a slim cigarette, apply mascara in the rearview mirror, tune the radio, send a BB message, and keep a hawk’s eye at the hot dude in the car next to her all while driving.

2.       They have no knowledge (or consideration) for traffic rules which especially include, allowing the driver in the round about to exit before they enter it, giving the right of way, meaning that if she and another car reach an intersection at the same time, the car on the right (not hers) has the right to pass ahead first, keeping the zebra crossing open, incase a God forsaken pedestrian was crossing, and keeping the right lane open, since most red lights exclude cars on the right lane who want to make a turn right.

3.       Another female crossing the street is her queue to increase acceleration, in the hopes of eliminating possible competition.

4.       The “No Parking” sign means “No Parking for Men”.

5.       The “Risk of Towing” sign means an opportunity to make doll eyes at a disgusting police officer.

6.       The red traffic light means “It doesn’t mean me”, “Oh I’m color blind”, “It’s just kidding”, “I should try that shade of red on my nails”.

7.       The “Wrong Way” or “Do not enter” sign means that she is new in town and doesn’t speak the language.

8.       Getting a speeding ticket means that is was an emergency.

9.       Getting a parking ticket means that the cop is such a womanizer.

10.   Scraping the car while passing in a narrow street means that the infrastructure is crap.

11.   Jamming the bumpers into both the car in the front and the car in the back means that the victims got what they deserved for leaving such a narrow parking spot for others.

12.   Jamming into the rear end of the car in front of her means that “the dumb ass stopped immediately.”

13.   Having someone jam into her rear bumper means that “the ass-hole is a charging bull.”

14.   They have all taken lessons in sign language and finger spelling that involve one particular finger.

15.   And finally, got forbid that you have a car accident with one of them and it turns out that it was 51% your fault…the whole neighbor hood would be on the balcony watching and listening to her unbearable shrieking and “classy” language.

Men drivers could be just as bad at driving as women, but I believe that women, being the softer gender, should be a little more calm and rational while operating heavy machinery.

Growing and Changing

When I was younger, I was selfish enough to wonder how people are able to spend money on household items instead of that amazing bag, or endure long agonizing family visits, when they know they prefer chilling in Gemmayze.  Times change, priorities change, people change, and then one silly incident makes you realize that you have become one of those people; a person whose world no longer revolves around him/ herself.

End of season sales were everywhere, so it was a great chance to stock up on some classic catches for next winter.  I had come across a “to die for” rabbit fur jacket at one of Beirut’s trendy boutiques and set my mind to it, but not before I raid other shops incase I find something better. A few days later, I was with my mom at a home ware department store which had, among other offers, an offer on a 15 piece “Tefal” pot set. 

While I was standing at the cash register to pay for my selection I started laughing ironically, that both my mom and the cashier asked me if I was okay.  I replied that I was quite fine, but in the middle of a life changing experience.  The money I had set aside to but the fur jacket was being spent on pots and pans for my new house. 

As silly as it might sound, the incident left me with a bitter sweet feeling.  I was no longer that care free fashionista, whose biggest challenge was to find the perfect pair of red pumps, but instead I was the wife-to-be, who is eager to help her fiancé with setting up their house. 

After that came a series of minor situations that kept proving that I have sincerely changed.  Family obligations, money saving, smart shopping, and taking responsibility in general.

Change is good.   

Amazing Ad

Bank Audi s.a.l. – Audi Saradar Group is the number one bank in Lebanon in terms of assets, loans and advances to customers, loans and discounts in foreign currencies, total retail and housing loans, total corporate and SMEs loans, customers’ deposits, shareholders’ equity, total income, total operating expenses, and number of branches; but this isn’t a banking course.

Bank Audi never seems to disappoint when it comes to their ads.